Proof Read

I always try to proof read whatever I write. For blogging, I will write it then wait a few hours and reread it. For the papers I write, I always have someone else give it a once-over to check for errors. This can be very important, as poor wording can change the meaning from one's original intent. Take these examples, from actual church newsletters, as case and point for the need of a proof reader.

• Tuesday at 4:00 p.m. there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk, please come early. (Yes, while I am sure that would work for making ice cream, most adults prefer cow's milk. You might want to specify this.)


• Wednesday, the Ladies Literary Society will meet. Mrs. Johnson will sing "Put Me In My Little Bed" accompanied by the Pastor. (A bit ambiguous in its interpretation. Exactly how will the Pastor accompany?)


• Thursday at 5:00 p.m. there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All wishing to become Little Mothers will please meet the minister in his study. (Wow! Okay, this is definitely less ambiguous than the above example. Do the elders know about this? And who named them "Little Mothers", anyway?)


• This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Johnson to come forward and lay an egg on the altar. (Miracles never cease, do they?)


• The service will close with "Little Drops of Water" . . . one of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join. (It's like hearing a waterfall when you feel the pressure in your bladder. Apparently it does only take a spark, so to speak.)


• On Sunday, a special collection will be taken to defray the expense of the new carpet. All wishing to do something on the carpet, please come forward and get a piece of paper. (I sure hope the paper is double-ply and quilted for my comfort!)


• The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind, and they may be seen in the church basement on Friday afternoon. (WooHoo! This should be a way to draw in the seekers! And it leads right into the grand finale . . .)


• This evening at 7:00 p.m. there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin. (You can do that in a public park? Do you need a special permit?)

Tags: Ambiguous, Misinterpretation, Church, Bulletin, Newsletter, Proof Read, Typo