Thursday, July 26, 2007

Pray, and pray

I've nothing pithy to share today. Instead, I'm asking for prayer from you, as I pray for friends.

Tonight Mrs. E and I are going to spend some time with a dear friend, praying over her. She's had hard times these last two years, as her husband first distanced himself, them moved out and divorced her. The divorce is final, but legal action continues over the settlement and custody rights/care for their little girl. She still loves him, I believe, but needs encouragement. Lots of it. She can neither continue the life she had with him nor really move on with a new life as long as the legal action persists. Frustration, fear and hurt are a big part of this limbo, and tonight we want to pray specifically for God to encourage her, to strengthen her, to let her know the love of her friends, and to find joy in the darkness and to give her patience as she learns His plan through this troubled time.

I ask you, my friends, to please pray for us, as her friends, to be a part of that encouragement and strength from Jehovah she needs. It is honestly about the most difficult thing I've ever done to try to be supportive without offering judgment on either of their actions. Offering encouragement and Godly wisdom without fueling bitterness and contention in their ongoing relationship (with a child, the relationship will never end). This is most especially hard when we see obvious actions on his part which can be discerned as sinful, and we may speak to his actions but not his heart.

I have also prayed much over the marriages of several other friends. Let’s face it, no marriage is the fairy tale ideal. We're sold on the lies of marital bliss, perfect love between a man and woman, perfect emotional and physical relationships; and it is in general a load of crock. There is only one perfect love, that of our Farther and Savior, and the only relationship we humans have with perfect love is our communion with Him - and the perfection is one sided, at that. We set our expectations for love, for sex, for parenting and marriage so high that anything short - that is, anything real - is too often considered failure. We have placed more stock in the words and rite of a ceremony than in the union of a couple. And this shows in our willingness to take back words, nullify the rite; but the union can never be undone. (Forgive me, I ramble.) So I ask, too, that you pray with me for marriages in general – mine, yours, everyone – that faith and love conquer expectations and disappointment.

One last thing on my heart is a couple, friends who have been trying to adopt and are still searching. Pray that God give them patience and bring them a child. And it you know anyone considering placing their child for adoption, point them to
Brian and Mel.

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3 comments:

Seth Ward said...

Great reminders Euph. So true.

I will be praying for your friend. I am sure that is the worst kind of suffering ouside of losing a child.

I've witnessed several marraiges torn apart and it is just tragic. You are very kind to spend that time in prayer with your friend.

marianne said...

I would say that it's crazy that I landed here tonight to read this, but it really isn't.

I will be praying for you as you encourage your newly divorced friend. She needs you. I know from living in her shoes.

She surely does have a long road ahead of her but through the love and care of friends, she will experience spurts of joy that will absolutely penetrate the darkness.

You are good friends.

euphrony said...

Thanks for your enouragment and prayers, Seth and Marianne. It was a good time spent last night, talking as friends with my wife and her and praying with her. Peace and strength are what she asked me to pray for, and I believe that God is granting her just that.

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